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Tough fish get all the ladies

November 30, 2010

Much like in the human dating world, fish dating can be very complicated. You think you’ve found your perfect mate and one fin to the jaw messes up your whole selection.

How hard is it to beat up another fish to win my love? Geez.

Let me back up a little bit. I had been dating one of the hottest fish in the ocean, Gary, when all of a sudden this brute of a fish Bubba shows up. And Gary, like the proper gentlemen he is, fought him to defend my honor! Well this was quite a turn on – at first. Until Bubba pummeled Gary until he was within an inch of his fishy life! So guess who I ended up having fish sex with – you guessed it, Bubba.

I can tell your judging me a little but I know you humans can relate – and science is on my side. Us female fish like our men tough. Watching our men beat down on an unsuspecting fish is a huge turn on. It applies to the human world too, it’s why hockey players get the hottest ladies even when they’re barely 5’8″ and sort of douchebags.

It’s always flattering to have a male fish fighting over you, but it can turn ugly quick. Before you decide to throw down you better know you’ll be able to get back up. You don’t want to embarrass yourself.

-Francine the Fish

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